I really like my work, but my coworkers are horrible

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And finally – you’ve made it! You’ve found your dream job! Well, almost… Somehow it happened that you truly love your job and you are doing well and have opportunities for growth and development, and it pays well and is close to home, but… you don’t get along with your colleagues. It seems that everyone is a back-stabber or a brown-noser. Every morning to go to work with a thought: “Another 8 hours in a snake pit…” So what to do? You don’t want to quit – everything else is good! Besides, there is a pandemic now: who is going to walk away from a good job?

Yes, this is not the happiest story. But there are options! Let’s brainstorm your alternatives.

If everything is really bad and we are not talking about simple likes and dislikes but harsh bullying – you need to save yourself. You can find another job, but to recover after such pressing and moral abuse can be hard. Therefore, if you are in a toxic environment and you feel that your coworkers are boycotting you, backstabbing, etc., perhaps the best option is to pack your things and move on. No job is worth ruined nerves and grey hair.

But not always things are this bad. Often, you can exist quite comfortably in the given circumstances.

1. Try to find like-minded people.

Sometimes it may seem that everyone is against us – all our colleagues are the same and equally horrible. But it is seldom the case. Take a closer look at each person. Do not look at your co-workers as a faceless mob: after all, it is composed of individuals.

You may find that this young woman never takes part in gossiping and political plotting. And that guy from another department seems quite nice – he helped you with the settings of your computer after the last update, and you didn’t even have to ask him. If you create your own community with reasonable colleagues – your life will be much easier.

2. Try to find friends.

No, we are not suggesting that you must find friends “no matter what”, but still, you should try. Often we can jump to conclusion that there are no options here and then we act estranged. But in reality, such conclusions may be too rash. Attend a moral event, strike up conversations with your coworkers, bring some sweets to the office – what if things are not that bad? At least you will know that you have tried.

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3. Stay away from toxic personalities.

At the end of the day, we are not going to work to form friendships. If relationships do not work out you need to accept that. Keep a little distance and do not allow yourself to get emotionally involved. Work on solving business problems and avoid personal interaction.

4. Respect others and be formal and polite.

Politeness can become a wonderful armor that will protect you from negative emotions, gossip, and other dirt. It will help you create distance and smooth out conflicts by preventing escalations. Do you remember this joke:

– How do you manage to be so calm and happy?

– I simply do not argue with anyone.

– But this is impossible!

– Well, if you say so – I agree, it is impossible.

The main thing is not to confuse politeness with being a push-over. Your task is to keep your internal balance and create distance. You can say “No” in a very polite form.

5. Do not bring work into your personal life.

Yes, this is a simple piece of advice but it works. Job is only a part of your life, not your whole life. Once you realize this it becomes much easier not to get fixated on work problems.

6. Learn and use relaxation techniques.

It helps a lot when you know how to manage your mood and emotional state and do not allow others to control it.


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