How to deal with aggressive people?

In critical situations people demonstrate different reactions: someone cries, someone hysterically, with someone the numbness and stupor happen. Or there may be reaction of anger, rage and uncontrolled aggression.

How it looks like: a person blushes, muscles strain, he  can shout at someone, threaten, throw with his fists, throw things, hit the wall, strive to punish those “who are guilty.” Frightening sight.

It is important to understand that such behavior is a response to circumstances, not  to you! In such situation, it is important not to allow the reaction to spread to other people, to protect others and yourself from aggressive actions and to help the person cope with the tsunami raging inside him.

How to help another person:

– call  a person by name, communicate politely, calmly, gradually begin to speak a little slower and quieter, if the contact is established, the person will begin to adjust to you and the reaction will fade;

– give a person an opportunity “let off steam” – to beat the pillow, tear the newspaper, crumple the sheets;

– If a person reacts to you normally and is ready to listen to him, ask him to tell you about how he feels, what he is mad at and who he gets angry with;

– ask to help, but do it as kindly as possible, so as not to provoke an increase of reaction: you can entrust him physically hard work;

– clarify and concretize what, in his opinion, should be done in this situation, offer a choice of two reasonable options: “Do you think it would be better … or  ….?;

– if aggression is excessive and insecure for others – remind that there may be consequences. If the potential strength and probability of punishment are high, aggressive behavior may become less pronounced.

– keep an eye on your own safety! Don’t stay one-on-one, if there is a risk that aggression will be directed at you.

Not recommended:

To argue, “get worked up” emotionally engaged, to have arguments, proving person´s wrong – the reaction will not be extinguished, on the contrary, you will ignite even more.

How to help yourself, If you feel that with anger you  literally shake:

-find an opportunity to stay alone. Strain your entire body muscles for 8-10 seconds. Then relax as much as possible. Repeat several times;

-breath slowly and calmly. With each exhalation imagine how anger comes out in the form of orange smoke clouds;

– run, squat, push  – any load will be suitable;

– if there is a possibility- call the close person and speak out, the feeling should find a way to go out;